Yes, It Is All My Fault!

Well, I guess I’ll have to figure out how to drag words out with no energy, because this become-a-writer ball I started rolling isn’t slowing down to wait on my exhausted ass.

Which means, in this case, that the academic paper (”What is the 21st century novel?”) my co-author Kit O’Connell and myself submitted to Arse Elektronica for this year’s conference on sex, technology, and storytelling…has been accepted. We’re off to San Francisco in late September to present on the “Narration” day of the conference.

How very exciting!

There are at least two major things to get done or seriously underway by then–and that doesn’t count actually writing the paper/presentation. It’ll be a busy summer!  Stay tuned here and elsewhere for more exciting ongoing updates.

have not-written for hmmm…many days now.

still need to cry, too.

I’ve figured out more of the problem. It’s not a words thing, it’s an energy thing. When I sit down to brainstorm, ideas come. When I sit down and actually outline or write, words come. I can feel the characters alive in my head when I go looking for them. But everything is beyond the gray wall, across the crevasse, and my flyer’s out of fuel. The energy that creativity takes, the physical toll on the body, is daunting right now. I can’t be sick any more, please gods and perverse imps.

The will is here. The muse is ever-near. The energy is fucking drained.

the household is running more smoothly, but I don’t feel any better. Everything is stressful and tiring, and the good things I miss taking the time to appreciate.

I suspect a dog’s evil work, here.

Ah ha! Tirma’s evil twin, the Half-a-Poodle!

Credit for the picture goes to: Kit, for the taking; Jennifer for the poodle sculpting; and Tirma for providing the raw art materials

They’re doing a fun marketing bit over at Unspeakable Horror’s anthology blog. Each weekday in May, they’ll reveal another author from their table of contents until the entire list has been revealed.

Since this is my first professional sale, I am fairly far down the list, so you might not see me pop up there until near the end of the month (I’m sure I’ll mention it specifically when it occurs). However, I looked up my fellow authors on the TOC and it sounds like a great collection. It’s worth your time to watch the blog and keep checking back regularly if you have any interest in the queer horror genre.

It’s May 1st, so they’ve started the unveiling!

Well enough to run errands today, yay! Long day.

Must not fall behind on work work stuff, but also have a tight writing schedule this week. Need to finish the zeroth draft of the current short story and Chapter 7 (neither should be hard with the multiple pages of notes for each I have arrayed), plus I need to think up and preferably write the zeroth draft of another short story I’d like to have ready for a contest due the end of this month.

Of course, the story idea that actually came to mind is the one due TWO months from now, rather than a month from now. Of course.

So I wrote a bunch of notes down for that one and am letting it cook on the backbrain. Hopefully the guys will help me brainstorm up an idea or three tonight for the due-earlier tale. Or perhaps tomorrow, it’s been a long day and not sure how much energy I have left.

These mental crushes, how I amuse myself. I love meeting cool people.

I’m still conflicted about Flipside. There’s so much I’ve missed doing at work due to illness, it’s not really the best time to be completely out of touch for five days. On the other hand, lying in bed sick does not an actual vacation make, and I haven’t really had one since LAST Flipside. So. Flip, flip, flip.

Still coming up heads.

Writing this latest short story, I’m having quite the strange sensation.

I’m enjoying the zeroth draft. I like my scenes. I certainly plan to keep going until the end. But the story, as is, is definitely not working.

It’s mostly working, mind you; it has nearly all of the bits a working story needs. Just perhaps, not quite in the right order yet. Or in correct disorder. Or however it ends up.

It feels weird, writing a story I know just isn’t quite working, is just disjointed enough to be broken, and yet still be enjoying the process and fundamentally liking the story. I’m hoping that means that the fixes are either minor or within my current skill level. I guess I’ll find out soon!